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A Cat Who Writes ([personal profile] acatwhowrites) wrote2016-07-18 04:12 pm

BTS-as-animals microfics

Jin/Suga + cat!J-Hope » G » 800w » Yoongi's cat steals men's underwear.

Yoongi's napping on the floor in the sunbeam warming the floor through his open balcony door when he hears someone having a bad day.

"Please come back! Oh—come on." Probably talking to their video game. "What are you even going to do with them? It's not like they'll fit. Trust me; we're far from the same size." Possibly an uncooperative small child. "No! Don't you do it..." Definitely talking to a child. "Don't you dare jump down. No nonono!" There's a long groan, and Yoongi hears a door sliding shut and then footsteps heading to the front door of the apartment right above him.

He's almost asleep again when a soft thmp thmp turns his head to the glass balcony door. "Hope?" A familiar trill answers him, followed by the thump and drag of his cat rubbing its body along the glass. He rolls over with a groan to get to his knees. "You can't come in the open window?" he grouses. He opens the door enough for the black cat to slink in, tail high, with baby blue underpants hanging from his jaws. "Really?" He closes the door and scoops up the pilfering puss.

"You've got a problem, cat." He takes the underwear from the cat. It has a cartoon print but look too large for a child. "Mario. Cute."

He's just sat down when someone knocks on the front door. Hope leaps to the floor and leads the way to the door, just to sit at Yoongi's feet and wait to greet the visitor to his domain. Yoongi peers through the peephole, but he doesn't recognise the young man outside. The chain rattles as he opens the door.


"Oh, hi! I'm Kim Seokjin; I live right upstairs." He points to Hope with a crooked smile. "Is that your cat?"

A smartass response wells in his throat, but he swallows it and nods. "Yeah. This is Hope. What's he done, now?"

"Well, I don't want to cause you any trouble," his fingers twist together, a ridiculous-looking nervous behaviour on such a tall person—with nice, broad shoulders, Yoongi notes idly—"but he was in my apartment earlier. I left my window open, and he must've come up the fire escape or something, but he kind of took...something...of mine. It's not expensive or anything! I don't want to punish him. I'd just like it back..."

Yoongi holds up his hand, letting the underpants hang from a fingertip. "This it?"

"Yes!" Seokjin balls them up in his fist. "Thank-Thank you."

"You missing any others?" Yoongi hitches a thumb over his shoulder. "I've got a sizeable collection of men's underwear that isn't mine."

"I don't think so, but if I am, I'll know where to go." Seokjin holds up one of the flyers Yoongi had spent the better part of his morning distributing to the neighbourhood. Across the top, in bold block font, reads ARE YOU MISSING UNDERWEAR? followed by My cat has been stealing socks and underwear for the past month. Please come get them. and ending with a simple address and email.

"Yeah.... He's got a problem." Hope purrs at Seokjin's feet, spinning figure-eights. His ears twitch when Yoongi makes a kissy sound and returns inside with a final drag of his tail against Seokjin's jeans. "Shameless."

Seokjin grins. As embarrassing as it is, having his underwear dragged through a stranger's apartment, he forgives the friendly cat. It's an opportunity to talk to his cute, elusive downstairs neighbour. "Would you like to go have coffee with me sometime? As a thank you for," he raises his fist a little, flashes of blue showing through his fingers, "you know."

"If it wasn't for my shameless monster, there'd be nothing to thank me about." Hope smiles at them, seated between Yoongi's bare feet.

"So should I be treating him, then?" The cat's ears stand alert at treat.

Yoongi scoffs. "And I call Hope shameless."

"How about I invite you both?" Seokjin turns up a bit more charm. "A welcome to the neighbourhood."

"Shameless and persistent. What do you think, Hobi?" The cat trills, an enthusiastic Yes! Yoongi nods. "We both accept bribes."

Seokjin laughs behind his free hand. "Good to know. Tomorrow morning okay?"

"Late morning." Yoongi greatly enjoys his sleep. So does Hope.

"I'll stop by at ten thirty."

"Sounds good." Yoongi shifts, and the security chain rattles. "I'll even undo this."

"Okay. Well..." He takes a couple steps backward and bows a little. "I'll see you tomorrow, then. Thanks again."

Hope meows; Yoongi lifts him to a shoulder and waves a petite paw. "Anytime." He closes the door when Seokjin disappears in a stairwell. "You are getting salmon tonight, my friend," Yoongi praises. Hope purrs emphatically.

+ There's a cat in New Zealand that is famous for stealing underwear. I think it'd be an interesting way to make new friends.

Jimin/V + cat!Suga » G » 890w » Taehyung wants to befriend All the cats.
Something Taehyung misses, among many things, after moving to Seoul, is walking his dog after dinner. Sometimes, he'd have to kind of drag her out, when she was feeling particularly lazy, but she was usually more than willing to walk around the block or go the park and simply enjoy life with Taehyung.

Seoul is fun to walk around in, not as fun as it'd be with company, though, and it does take a while before Taehyung can leave his apartment with some percentage of a chance to not get lost right away.

He likes to go into the alleys before the sun sets, finding hidden places and parks that are more for the strays than people, and he discovers healthy cat population living right around his own apartment building. He makes it his mission to greet them all and make friends, because cats.

One evening, after Taehyung finally excuses himself from his overly kind landlady and gets outside for a walk with his pockets stuffed with treats, he sees a gorgeous white cat. It's entirely white, like a cloud with legs, and sports a tiny black bandanna around its neck. It walks with all the purposeful poise of a privileged housewife through high society, if high society were trash cans, abandoned pallets, and weeds taller than its hooked tail.

Taehyung's fingers tingle, and he follows with every intention to pet the cat and find out if it's as soft as it looks.

It's rather dirty; he's amazed the cat manages to look so clean and pretty. He crouches beneath a fire escape and unwraps a meat bun. "Hey, kitty." An ear rotates his way. "You hungry? Want some of this?"

The cat looks at him without an inkling of curiosity and turns around, tail high.

"Hey! Wait!" He tries meowing, and he sees an ear twitch, but the cat glowers at him, leaps onto the lid off a dumpster, and Taehyung wonders what he's said.

"Sorry, he doesn't like strangers."

He just about falls onto his butt, immediately thinking he's hearing the divine voice of God, and whips his head around.

"Up here." Taehyung drops his head back, and sure enough, there's a guy—not God, unless God is younger than he's been lead to believe, has a cute oval face, a cute flat nose, and absolutely lovely, full lips—leaning out of a window three stories up. He offers a small wave and shy smile. "I'm Park Jimin." He points to Taehyung's building. "I think you live across from me." His window is close to the fire escape, which is how the white cat leaps onto the sill and rubs its spine under Jimin's chin, hooking Jimin's nose with his serpentine tail, and finally sits with its back to the alley to clean his paws. "This is Yoongi. He's just old." The cat ignores the kiss pressed to his shoulder.

"Hi! I'm Kim Taehyung." With Yoongi up by Jimin, other cats miraculously slink out from their various hiding places, approaching Taehyung with open affection and begging meows, more than willing to accept pieces of meat bun. "I don't know who these cats are, or I'd introduce you."

Jimin watches with a shocked grin, eyebrows hidden behind his bangs. "You're awfully popular. I don't usually see so many."

Taehyung gathers an armful of cats and piles them onto his lap. "We're friends. I think they've adopted me as one of their own, because I hang around so much."

"I have noticed you a few times." He scratches behind Yoongi's ears, running his hand down the silky fur.

"Yeah, we're all trash babies." He picks apart a couple more buns, hunkered over the cats purring on his lap, and scatters the bits to the clowder of alley cats.

"Hey, you're feeding the cats, but have you eaten, yet?"

"Nope. And my fridge is pretty much empty," condiment packages and flat cola did not a nutritious meal make, "so I was gonna head to the convenience store."

Jimin plays with Yoongi's tail, watching it jerk and sway away from his fingers. "It's kind of lonely, just me and Yoongi, and I already ordered a pizza... Would you like to come up?" His cat hops to the floor and disappears, apparently appalled by the invitation.

Taehyung, however, is delighted. "Really?!" He kindly dislodges the cats from his thighs and wipes off damp paw prints. "Feed me, and I'll love you forever."


Taehyung can't hear well over the clamour of cats. "What?"

"Nothing. Come on around to the front, and I'll buzz you in."

"Why bother?" Taehyung follows Yoongi's route to the fire escape, and it's a good thing he's up to date on his tetanus shots with all the rust and alley slime. He crouches beside Jimin's window. "This is much more convenient. And we really do live right across from each other. I should get some curtains or something. Free food is one thing, but a free show is something else entirely." He waves at the alley cats. They meow and trill back.

Jimin laughs and pushes the window open more. "The pizza could be payment, so both are earned."

Taehyung unfolds his long legs inside Jimin's apartment, ducking in after clearing the sill. "That works! I'm easy."




On the one sofa, Yoongi snorts softly.

+ I wrote this on my phone before sleeping. This prompt spoke to me, because I also want to befriend All the cats, but it's like they know it and make me work for their trust and/or tolerance. (But it's so worth it.) I also had the idea of a neighbor having a crush on the neighbor across the way, because we covet what we see every day. (So this fic was partly inspired by Silence of the Lambs. It's not meant to be creepy, but I guess it could be...)

dog!Jimin + J-Hope » G » 760w » Hoseok's dog has a crush on the cat across the street.

Every afternoon, Jimin and his pet walk the block from their apartment block to the park like clockwork. His pet returns home from work, takes off his shoes, goes to the kitchen, sets a small chicken on the the stove to boil, and makes himself dinner. They eat, his pet gets Jimin's harness, puts his shoes on,clips a leash to his harness, and they go out.

On the way home, they're on the sidewalk opposite their building. A low brick wall with wrought iron fencing separates the small grassy lots from the concrete sidewalks. One building before the corner, Jimin stops and stands on his little hind legs, looking between the iron bars at the cat in the window. Every afternoon, the same fluffy red cat naps in the setting sun that warms the front window. Sometimes, the cat's awake and idly watched the street just to walk back and forth along the window when Jimin and his pet walk by. Jimin's pet couldn't hear the rumbly purrs, but Jimin could.

One day, Jimin stood up on the fence and couldn't see into the window. Plants blocked the view. He paced, trying to find a better angle, but all he saw was healthy green leaves. He whined and paced, even when his pet scratched his ears and tried to calm him down. Even the little ice cream treat he devoured when they returned home was tasteless and unsatisfying.

Every day, Jimin looked at the green-filled window and whined the rest of the way home with a droopy tail and lowered ears.

While snuggled on the couch with his head on the sofa arm and rest of him on his pet's lap, Jimin sighed heavily. He could see the apartment across the street, dark and without a beloved cat in the window. His pet scratched his side and said, "Know what, bud? I'll fix this," but Jimin only understood the mellow tone his pet used when serious.

The next day, Jimin trotted by his pet's side, sniffing out familiar and new smells and reclaiming key property as his own. His leash was unclipped at the park, and he chased some squirrels and tennis balls with a few friends. Walking home on the opposite sidewalk, he dragged his paws a little, nails scraping the cement. His pet approached the gate to the apartment building, leaving something on the door while Jimin stood up at the wall and strained to see around the plants.

But, there was no cat or pleasing purrs.

His pet led him home and turned on the picture box. Jimin didn't even have the energy to bark at the strange dogs.

Jimin felt his pet's excitement when he came home the next day. He was singing as he opened the door, and he caught Jimin's forepaws when he jumped up, even though he knew he shouldn't, and danced a hopping sort of dance to the kitchen. He talked while pulling out chicken from the kitchen. Jimin barked and wagged his tail at good boy and Jiminnie.

He's excited while eating, impatiently waiting for his pet to finish and drinking an entire bowl of water just for something to do. He could hardly hold still for his pet to strap on his harness, tie his shoes, and attach a leash.

His pet ran around with him at the park until they both had to lay on the grass under a shady tree. Jimin nuzzled his muzzle around his pet's hand until finger scratched the top of his nose and over his head. It's a good day, but the energy dwindled a little, and it's enough to make Jimin's tail droop a bit as they walked home.

But he followed routine, and he glanced up at the cat's apartment as they approached the corner crosswalk.

He stilled, then his tail wagged excitedly. He surged ahead, his pet laughing as he was dragged along, and stood up to put his paws on the low wall and watch the cat in the window. It sat on its hind legs and pawed the glass, purring and meowing.

The plants were all gone, leaving only a green piece of paper that his pet read out loud. "For true love!" Jimin smiled his doggy smile when his fur was ruffled, tail wagging so hard his rear wiggled.

Jimin had to be tugged a little, and he stopped a few times to look back, but he followed his pet home with renewed energy and faith in life.

All was right with the world again.

+ Based off of this inspirational love story.
+ The cat could be anyone, but I envision Seokjin as a Somali. They're smart and gorgeous, with a kind of a foxy look.